For about all my life I have struggled about self image. You look at these stupid tabloids, internet and television and all the "pretty" girls get all the guys, the best jobs and everything they want, [so we think]. But then there's the slightly over weight girls who never get asked to a dance in high school, or cant fit into the cute clothes at the store. It is beyond frustrating. 
I've never struggled with if I was pretty or not. I know Im not an ugly girl. Christ made me, crafted me with His beautiful hands and I am what I am. 
But what Im not is in shape. 
I want to run and not get winded so fast. 
I want to go rock climbing with my man. 
I want to go to the beach and wear a cute bathing suit and feel good when I take my clothes off. 
I want to go wedding dress shopping and not be freaked out that they probably wont have dresses in my size to even try on. 
Im ready. 
Im tired of being tired. 
Im tired of the excuses. 
Im tired of saying Im going to do something and then hide when I fail. 
So, Im going to be transparent. 
Im going to try to be accountable to my blog. 
Im going to record my food, my exercise, my success and my failures. 
The number are a scary thing. 
Its 9:40pm and Im going to weigh myself. [I know you aren't supposed to weigh yourself at night, but I dont care, I want every number to change. Morning, noon or night.]
Please pray for me, for my success, and my growth. 

Here we go. EEEKKKKKKKK. :/

Starting weight: 191 lbs
Goal weight: 140 lbs
Total weight loss: 51 lbs

Food Journal for March 23, 2011

Breakfast: oatmeal cream pie. ( I know, weird, but it is all I could find)
                 grapes (about 15)
Lunch: 6 inch Turkey sandwich on wheat bread from Subway
             light mayo, mustard, american cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, salt/pepper, oil/vinegar
            -pop chips
Snack: Fun size kit kat
Dinner: 1/2 tilapia with crab meat
             1/2 cup of brocolli
Dessert: 3 tbs of vanilla ice cream

Work out: Ran/Jog/Walked for 30 minutes. 

SUCCESS for the DAY: I did not have one soda today. I did have a red bull this morning, but green tea and water were my friend today. I am so proud of myself. 

Alright. Now your turn. 
Have any of you struggled with the same thing I do? Do you have any tips? Any sort of encouragement would be extremely welcomed. :)
Thanks for "listening".

Much love people. 

A fabulous Life